Member: Big4
Big4's Resumes
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Big 4 Resume 10 reviews
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- 15 March 2008, 06:13 PM
Big4's Reviews
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28 April 2009, 05:27 PM
The resume with skills is much better, but make sure to keep it to one page. Also, consider moving the skills section to the bottom. To make sure everything fits on one page, open the margins on either side of your document. That way you will fill the page and accomplish the much needed goal of a one page resume with essential skills items mention at the bottom. Additionally, your resume will look more professional by having much less blank space. Look at some other top rated resumes on Razume for formatting ideas. Lastly, you can remove the objective and references, the do not add value to your resume.
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28 April 2009, 05:23 PM
Sorry to hear about your employment situation. Be sure to send this link around to others in financial services requesting feedback and asking for advice. Here are my comments: First make sure to update your computer skills section. I suggest just having one category for computer skills not hardware and software. Given you worked at Smith Barney as did I as an intern, you should have some experience with Bloomberg, Reuters or other financial specific software--make sure to put that down. Regarding your bullet language, I suggest you have more bullets for your Smith Barney experience and fewer as you go down. That will show employers visual progress and make it clear that your recent work experience is more important to your career than your work as a lifeguard. Consider 5-6 bullets for Smith Barney (detailing your achievements with numerical values!) and 1-2 bullets for your oldest experience. Additionally, you might want to remove some of the less impressive work experience such as lifeguard, simply because it's not relevant any more. Best of luck.
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13 April 2009, 08:51 AM
Leximo, nice work with your resume. A few key comments you should consider. 1) for someone with your educational level, I would consider having a one page resume. Two pages is appropriate for certain situations, but as a former recruiter, I can tell you that some organizations will not even look at two page resumes for young graduates or soon to be graduates. 2) The summary information takes up too much space. Your resume is a summary, therefore, it should neatly fit on one page with the following sections in the following order: "Education", "Work Experience", "Leadership/Other"and "Skills". Once you've been in the workforce 1-2 years, you'll want to move "Education" below "Work experience". Further, because of your comp sci background, you'll want a nice large section at the bottom for skills (including language and computer, etc.). 3) On formatting, it looks pretty good, but try to have only one level of bulleting--no check marks or extra indentation. 4) Similarly, on formatting, keep it consistent. Currently, some sections use bullets others do not. Overall, good content here, just needs to be shortened to one page and some improvements on the format.
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28 March 2009, 08:50 PM
You have strong academic credentials and some good work experience and skills, but your resume format is not very traditional. As a former recruiter, I can tell you that some employers may not take your resume format seriously. Although your goal is likely to show creativity and uniqueness, you may want to save those qualities for your interviews. My suggestion is to model traditional resumes posted on Razume and to keep everything to one page. Additionally, you've been out of school since 2004, so it's time to move your education section below your work history. Best of luck.
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28 March 2009, 08:07 PM
Overall, I like what you've done with your resume. I have a few comments on format and some comments on content. Most important comments: I think you're much better off with a 1 page resume. Although you have some good work experience and excellent skills, many employers will not even look at 2 page resumes. Further, consider removing your objective as its fairly vague. Additionally, remove the "degree in process" part. You already say "expected grad. date", therefore it's very clear you're still in school. Lastly, your bullet language is good, however, it would be best to add more quantified examples of your work achievements. Again, nice work overall. With a few tweaks, it should be ready for the work force in no time.
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22 March 2009, 10:28 AM
Overall, your resume is well constructed. I very much like the bulleting language and your use of numerical values to highlight your achievements. I would suggest adding an education or skills section to complement your work experience. Further, consider shortening the narrative text at the top of each work experience section. As a former recruiter, I can tell you I paid little attention to large blocks of text and skimmed the resume for numerical/bulleted highlights. Again nice work here and thanks for providing reviews to others on Razume. I'm sure they greatly appreciate your insight. Best of luck.
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21 November 2008, 11:08 AM
Judy, try adding bullet points rather than having long blocks of text. By browsing some resumes on Razume, you'll get an idea of what works well for bullet point language. Typically 5 to 6 detailed bullet points that discuss achievements and use numerical values work best. Best of luck.
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21 November 2008, 11:02 AM
Overall, your resume is very professional and you have great academic experience. On formatting, I would suggest broadening the margins on the left side to fill the page more fully. Additionally, I would try to enhance your skills section with more finance related computer experience. Take a look at some top rated resumes on Razume for examples. Lastly, many others looking for finance positions can benefit from your resume writing knowledge. Be sure to provide reviews for others looking for help--it's good karma.
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7 November 2008, 11:08 AM
Mark, as we discussed I suggest the following: 1) try to add more bullets and more detail to those bullets for your most recent positions. Employers will be looking at your most recent positions fairly closely. 2) Widen the margins on your resume on the left side. This will help you look more professional by filling the page more fully. If you find widening the margins brings your resume to one page, keep it at one page--1 page is preferred by many recruiters. 3) Make sure to incorporate key words from the job description on your resume. This will take time and may require you to adjust your resume for each job description, but will help your resume get picked up in keyword searches. 4) Lastly, given the state of the economy, it's best to utilize any employee referrals for jobs. Try to network with people at the companies where you are applying. Best of luck.
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28 October 2008, 05:46 PM
Connie, I agree your format could be revitalized. I suggest you start your search for the perfect structure by looking at the highest rated resumes on Razume (under browse tab, sort by highest rated). The structure I like (as you can see from my resume) uses Work Experience, Education and Skills sections. It's clean and simple and allows recruiters to find what they're looking for quickly. Your current resume is much too long and your bullet points are very wordy. As a former recruiter, I can tell you it's best to keep things short, aim for one page, two max. Best of luck.
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28 October 2008, 05:41 PM
Crystal, although you have outstanding academic and work experience credentials, I would suggest you keep your resume to 2 pages. Depending on where you send your resume, some recruiters will be receptive to longer resumes, where others will not. Additionally, writing a two page resume will help you focus on your core competencies, which need to be identifiable to employers at first glance. Unfortunately, your experience is highly specialized, so I cannot provide highly detailed comments. None the less, I suggest you request feedback from colleagues in your field by using the "email this resume" box to the right of your resume. Best of luck.
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28 October 2008, 05:26 PM
The structure of your resume is good. I would now try to use bullet points, rather than paragraphs. With bullets make sure you add enough details to highlight your achievements. For example, as a stylist you should talk about the numbers of clients you served and the level of responsibility, not just the tasks that you did (ie: cut, style, color, etc.). Best of luck.
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28 October 2008, 05:13 PM
Overall, you have good work experience, but your resume is much to long for most employers. You should aim for a two page resume max, which will allow recruiters to skim the document and find key information. Additionally, I would consider removing the summary portion up top. Your resume should be a summary unto itself, no additional summary should be needed.
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28 October 2008, 05:10 PM
Unfortunately, I don't have the background to provide you a proper critique. However, I suggest you send this link to your resume to those directly involved with your career field and they can use Razume to provide feedback quickly and easily. Also you can use the "Email this resume" box located to the right of your resume.
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28 October 2008, 05:07 PM
I would suggest a different format for your resume, although stick with your current format if it works for you. The structure I like involves the following sections in this order: Work Experience, Education, Skills. Take a look at some top rated resumes on Razume to get a better idea of how this new structure might benefit you. Best of luck.
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28 October 2008, 05:04 PM
Your resume is will constructed, but is a bit wordy. Try to condense everything down to one page. That will require you to remove some of your least important bullet points and reconsider the first section. Rather than listing key skills up top, consider moving it down to a new skills section at the bottom. Take a look at some top rated resumes on Razume to get a better idea of how a Work Experience, Education, Skills structure on one page can work well. Best of luck.
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28 October 2008, 05:01 PM
You clearly know what you're doing when it comes to writing resumes. My only suggestions: list GPA if greater than 3.0, list the date of your degree, and move your skills below employment.
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28 October 2008, 04:59 PM
A good start, but looks to be more in draft format than final format. Try widening the margins on the page and filling it more fully with text. Take a look at some top rated resumes on Razume for an idea of how you can reformat your resume. Also, try to add more detail to your bullet points. Best of luck.
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28 October 2008, 02:43 PM
Nice looking resume. You clearly know what you are doing when it comes to structuring a resume. Be sure to share your knowledge with others on Razume. You can help job seekers like yourself by suggesting they look at your resume. One question: the background "FC" shows up on your document on purpose? It may seem unusual to certain recruiters, although it does make your resume stand out.
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28 October 2008, 10:55 AM
Sue, to make your resume look as professional as possible, I strongly recommend keeping everything to one page. Additionally, you should consider restructuring your resume to have the following sections in this order: Work Experience, Education and Skills. Focus on hard skills (like computer and language skills) rather than soft skills (such as "effective communicator"). Best of luck/
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28 October 2008, 10:52 AM
Shannon, your resume has the right ingredients, but you can improve the presentation and level of detail. Take some time to research top rated resumes on Razume for examples of what works well for presentation and format. At first glance, your resume looks a little bare. You can create a professional look for yourself by increasing the margins to fill the page more fully. Although presentation and format are not as important as content, they can make a differences given recruiters spend only seconds looking at the average resume.
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28 October 2008, 10:47 AM
You have strong qualifications for administrative assistant positions, but your resume presentation can be improved. Consider restructuring your resume by removing the top qualifications portion, or making that section much smaller. Then you will have much more room to add detailed bullets to your Work Experience section, while keeping everything to one page. Take a look at some top rated resumes on Razume for examples. Best of luck.
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28 October 2008, 10:44 AM
Your resume has all the key ingredients, but you might stand out more for recruiters if you keep everything down to one page. Additionally, you should consider removing some of your least relevant and older work experience and add more detailed bullet points for your most recent 4-5 positions. Take a look at some top rated resumes on Razume for examples. Best of luck.
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28 October 2008, 10:03 AM
Overall, I find your format very difficult to read. Separating your skills into two columns in the middle of your resume is the main problem. Try to research some top rated resumes on Razume to determine a better format. Best of luck.
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28 October 2008, 09:57 AM
Have you considered a one page resume? It would make your credentials stand out more prominently. A one page resume can be accomplished by widening your margins. Take a look at some top rated resumes on Razume for examples of one page resumes that stand out.
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28 October 2008, 09:46 AM
Your resume has all the basics, now you should focus on making yourself stand out on paper. I would suggest researching some top rated resumes on Razume in Communications. See what works well for your field. As a former recruiter, I can tell you that adding more detail to your bullet points and fully filling your page, will help you stand out. You should also add the language section to your the skills section. Best of luck.
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28 October 2008, 09:30 AM
Your resume is much too long. Everything should fit on two pages maximum. Further, your resume structure needs a lot of work. Focus on the three core areas of: work experience, education, skills. Try looking at some top rated resumes on Razume for examples. Best of luck
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28 October 2008, 09:28 AM
Given you're a fairly recent graduate, I would try to get everything on one page. As a former recruiter in financial services, I can tell you a concise one page resume will be much more effective. By widening the margin for your resume, you will easily be able to fit everything on one page. Also, consider reading/researching professional cover letters. Your cover letter isn't poor, but isn't captivating either. To start, make sure your cover letter talks about what employers want, not what you want (for example, remove this line: "An ideal position for me...". Instead, say something like "I can add great value to your organization by...").
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28 October 2008, 09:21 AM
Dawn, I think you've done a nice job with your resume, but can make a few improvements. I would consider moving your first paragraph down to the bottom of your resume into a separate "skills" section. Starting off with work history is effective. Then, I would remove any mention of staffing firms that placed you with the companies. I've never seen that done before, so it's best to leave that information out and mentioned it if asked. Best of luck.
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28 October 2008, 09:17 AM
Your resume looks to be more in draft form than final form. I would take some time to research resumes and determine what information you need listed. Aim for a one page resume that fills the page fully. You should consider listing the following sections in this order: Work Experience, Education, Skills. Try looking at some top rated resumes on Razume for examples. Best of luck
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28 October 2008, 09:13 AM
Your content is great, especially the wealth of educational experience, but consider a different format for greater effectiveness. Also, try expanding your work history section with bullet language, not paragraphs of text. Try looking at some top rated resumes on Razume for examples of well bulleted text. Best of luck
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28 October 2008, 09:11 AM
Your resume is very comprehensive, but includes much more information than needed. Rather than large blocks of text and 6-7 bullet points, try for 4-5 bullet points with one or two lines of text each. Making your resume easily scannable by recruiters is the key. Currently, it's very difficult to scan. Try looking at some top rated resumes on Razume for examples. Best of luck
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28 October 2008, 09:07 AM
A few comments, but overall, well done. I would remove the bullets at the top as they add little value to your core resume. Also, I would try to get your resume down to one page. Lastly, I would try to incorporate more numerical values into your bullet points. Highlighting achievements with quantified results can be very impressive, especially for financial professionals.
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27 October 2008, 06:09 PM
Karen, you have the basic elements in play, but consider creating a one page resume. Also you should break out your skills in a separate section. The core sections should be Employment, Education, Skills. Lastly, consider adding more detail for your bullet points. Show detailed descriptions of achievements. Try looking at some top rated resumes on Razume for examples. Best of luck.
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27 October 2008, 06:01 PM
Your cover letter looks good-- I would just remove the ".." in between the "demonstrated skills" paragraph and list fewer skills. For your resume, you have too many sections, making it difficult to find relevant information. Recruiters want three things mostly, so list them in this order: Work Experience, Education, Skills. The other sections do not add the right value. Try looking at some top rated resumes on Razume for examples. Best of luck.
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27 October 2008, 05:55 PM
Overall, a well written resume. A few points: you should list the date of your education and move the education section below work history. Also, try to add numerical values to your bullet points, it will make you standout against other applicants. Best of luck.
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27 October 2008, 05:51 PM
Dawn, I think your resume structure can be improved to make you look more professional. You should consider having the following sections in this order for a one page resume: Work experience, Education, Skills. You have an excellent skills section and simply need to move that to the bottom. You need a lot of work on your work experience section. Rather than just listing employers and dates, you need to add bullets for details about your accomplishments. Try looking at some top rated resumes on Razume for examples. Best of luck.
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27 October 2008, 05:46 PM
Cindy, your resume looks good, but can be improved. You may want to consider a two page resume, where you remove the summary of qualifications, shorten up the least recent work history items and add education and skills sections. Education and skills are crucial elements of your resume which you are missing. For skills, try to focus on hard skills such as computer and language skills. Also, Try looking at some top rated resumes on Razume for examples. Best of luck.
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27 October 2008, 05:32 PM
Overall, your resume looks good. You should consider consolidating certain sections to keep everything to two pages. For example, the summary of experience should be removed/folded into your work experience section. Also, make sure to list bullet points for work experience, not paragraphs of text. Also, try looking at some top rated resumes on Razume for examples of what works best for PR resumes. Best of luck.
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27 October 2008, 05:26 PM
Your format is very confusing to recruiters. Go with something more tradition so employers can find the information they're look for. Try looking at some top rated resumes on Razume for examples. Best of luck.
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27 October 2008, 05:25 PM
Impressive experience and nice format. You should consider sharing your knowledge by providing reviews to others on Razume, specifically those who attend/graduated from GW. Only question, where is your education section? Credentials does not allow employers to find your degree easily--I skilled over it at first.
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27 October 2008, 05:20 PM
Impressive work experience and tenure at S&P. I would consider consolidating your education section to only list degrees/relevant training. Also, widen the margin on your page so that you have less white space to the left. You may consider consolidating everything to 1 page, but two would be acceptable for your level of experience. Lastly, remove the references (only submit when asked) and add a skills section focusing on hard skills relevant to publishing.
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27 October 2008, 05:14 PM
MT, the format and structure of your resume should be reconsidered. 3 pages is too long. Try for 1 page, but 2 pages will also work for your level of experience. I suggest your look at some top rated resumes on Razume in the Health Care field. Most excellently structured resumes have the following sections in the following order: Work Experience, Education, Skills. Lastly, for work experience, list text in bullet format to make it easy to skim by employers. Best of luck.
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27 October 2008, 05:09 PM
You have a good start, but you need to add much more detail to your work experience section. Try looking at some top rated resumes on Razume for examples of what works well. Also, remove the references section. Best of luck.
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27 October 2008, 05:07 PM
A good start, but you can make significant improvements. For your skills section, try to focus on hard skills over soft skills like "good communicator". Also, try to add a training or education section if possible. Lastly, remove the references section--if references are needed employers will ask. Best of luck and enjoy Portland--great part of the country.
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27 October 2008, 05:03 PM
Overall, a nice looking resume. Make sure to share your knowledge with others on Razume. You can improve your resume by quantifying the bullet items. Use numerical values to show your achievements. Best of luck.
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27 October 2008, 05:01 PM
Have you considered a one page resume? you might get better results given you've recently graduated. Otherwise, your content is very good. I would just take a look at some top rated resumes on Razume for an idea of how you can restructure your resume for one page. Consider the following sections in this order: Work Experience, Education, Skills. Best of luck.
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27 October 2008, 04:58 PM
If possible, I would try to keep your resume to one page. You can do this by removing the objective statement (which is not adding much value) and only focusing on the top 4 or 5 work experience items that are relevant to your next job. Once you ID these top jobs, make sure to add bullet points for details about your achievements. Try looking at some top rated resumes on Razume for examples. Best of luck.
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27 October 2008, 04:55 PM
Nice work with your resume. It seems the actuarial field has a certain format for resumes, so be sure to consult others in your field. Also, try looking at some top rated resumes on Razume for examples in your field. Lastly, consider removing the hobbies section and replacing it with skills--something that's more important to employers. Best of luck.
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27 October 2008, 04:53 PM
You have the basics down, but make sure you keep everything to one page. One page will make you look much more professional and allow you to present yourself confidently. Also, you need more detail for your work experience. Try looking at some top rated resumes on Razume for examples. Most well written one page resumes have the following sections in this order: Work Experience, Education, Skills. Best of luck.
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27 October 2008, 04:50 PM
Not a bad start to your resume. Make sure to list things in reverse chronological order, meaning you should have more recent items on top. For example, your high school information should be moved below college. Also, be sure to add more detail to your bullet points in work experience. Detail your achievements and keep them relevant to the news industry. Try looking at some top rated resumes on Razume for examples. Best of luck.
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27 October 2008, 04:44 PM
Susan, you have excellent experience/skills and present yourself very well through your resume. I encourage your to share your knowledge with others on Razume by providing feedback to other job seeker resumes. One comment: consider listing multiple bullet points for your employment history. Bullets work better than text blocks/paragraphs. Best of luck and hope to see your reviews on Razume.
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27 October 2008, 04:41 PM
You might want to try a 1 page resume rather than two. Employers generally prefer 1 page unless you can demonstrate decades of experience. Try removing the summary section up front and starting with Education (as you're still in school) then Work Experience. Also, try looking at some top rated resumes on Razume for examples. Best of luck.
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27 October 2008, 04:36 PM
I believe your resume's not living up to it's full potential. You might be better situated with a one page resume and removing the profile section at the top. Also, be sure to add more details behind your current position. Employers want to see progression in your employment history, meaning you should have more bullet points for recent positions fewer going down.
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27 October 2008, 04:20 PM
Not a bad format, but your content can be improved. Consider keeping your resume to one page. To accomplish this, remove the qualifications section and the references section. Look at some top rated resumes on Razume for formatting examples.
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27 October 2008, 04:18 PM
Your resume could use some work, but you have strong experience. Try a different format that focuses on the following sections in this order: work experience, education, skills. Leave off the references--employers will ask you for them if they need them.
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27 October 2008, 04:15 PM
Consider adding a skills section at the bottom. Otherwise, your resume is in pretty good shape. You may want to add numerical values to your bullet points to make yourself standout. Also, you may want to move your education section below work experience as you've been in the work force for a few years.
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27 October 2008, 02:02 PM
You have good experience and education, but your format could be improved. Your structure looks too formulaic and includes too many sections. Consider a more traditional approach, that emphasizes your work history. Look at some top rated resumes on Razume for examples.
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27 October 2008, 01:47 PM
Consider having a one page resume rather than two. Your first page has too much information, that should be take out. If you look at top rated resumes on Razume you'll see that many follow this section format: Work Experience, Education, Skills. Consider reworking your resume into that structure. Best of luck.
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27 October 2008, 01:44 PM
Time to move your education section below work experience. Also shorten or remove the objective. Instead use that language in your cover letter. Lastly, add more numerical values to your bullet point accomplishments. Quantify your experience. Best of luck.
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27 October 2008, 01:41 PM
Try to add more detail to your resume bullet points. You have some good work experience, but don't list any detail about your accomplishments in those positions. Look at some top rated resumes on Razume for a better idea of how to standout.
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27 October 2008, 01:38 PM
Impressive athletic and academic accomplishments! With some more detail and work experience you will have an outstanding resume. Take a look at some top rated resume for an idea of work works well for the actuary field. Best of luck.
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27 October 2008, 01:28 PM
I noticed you do not have an educational section listed on your resume. Employers will ask, so it's best to create a section and list what you can. Also, you have great work experience, but need to present this experience in bullet format. Text paragraphs make finding key information difficult for recruiters.
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27 October 2008, 01:26 PM
The overall structure of your resume is good, but you should consider adding more detail to your bullet points to stand out. Also consider removing the objective statement as it does not add much value and takes up the top part of your resume. Best of luck.
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27 October 2008, 01:24 PM
Make sure to use bullet points for your accomplishments and do your best to keep your resume to one page. Also, nice use of numerical values to explain your accomplishments. Try to use more numerical values in the top half of your resume.
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27 October 2008, 01:03 PM
Biggest draw back to your resume is the lack of bullet points. Blocks of text are hard to read, take a look at some top rated resumes on Razume for an idea of what works well for bullet point language. Best of luck.
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27 October 2008, 01:02 PM
You have excellent experience and training. Your format is not traditional, given the use of icons and the green box, but if it works for your industry go for it. You may also want to create a more traditional version of your resume that is text only for those more traditional employers. Best of luck.
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27 October 2008, 12:59 PM
Overall, nice layout and good content. You should, however, look to keep your resume to one page. Consider removing or condensing the objective statement to make more room. Also, remove the references section and add a skills section if possible. Best of luck.
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27 October 2008, 12:57 PM
Your cover letter looks good and you have great skills, but your resume is much much too long. You need to have a resume that's one or two pages max. Many recruiters will not even consider candidates who have recently graduated that present a 4-5 page resume. Best of luck.
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27 October 2008, 12:52 PM
Your content is good, but you need more detail. You should also take a look at some top rated IT resumes on Razume for a better idea of what stands out. Lastly, given that you're still in school, be sure to list education first then work experience, then skills. Best of luck.
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27 October 2008, 12:50 PM
Samantha, sorry to hear about the recent events at Mervyns. You have a strong resume and I'm sure you will find success in your future endeavors. A few suggestions: consider removing or shortening the summary section on top. Also, make sure to add a date for your education section as employers will likely ask. Best of luck and be sure to share your resume writing knowledge with others on Razume. Many other job seekers can benefit from your shared experience.
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27 October 2008, 12:44 PM
Sue, you have very impressive work experience and we appreciate that you're using Razume for resume feedback. Given the executive nature of your experience and the unique circumstances of executive recruiting, I can provide few suggestions. None the less, I wish you much success in your future endeavors and suggest you contact an executive recruiting firm regarding best practices for resume presentation.
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27 October 2008, 12:27 PM
The formatting could use some work and you should consider adding more detailed bullet points under work experience. Your skills section is impressive, but make sure to move it below your work experience section. Take a look at some top rated resumes on Razume for a better idea of what works well for your career path. Best of luck.
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27 October 2008, 12:25 PM
Very organized looking resume. You certainly know what you're doing so, be sure to share your knowledge with others on Razume. Only comment: add more numerical values to your bullet points to highlight your achievements. Best of luck.
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27 October 2008, 12:23 PM
Overall, your content is good, but you need to add much more detail. Also, from a formatting perspective, consider widening the margins on your resume so that you fill the page more fully. This will also help you keep everything to one page. Best of luck.
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27 October 2008, 12:21 PM
Overall, a nice looking resume. I would consider removing the highlights portion at the top and keeping your resume to one page. One page resumes are looked upon highly by recruiters. Additionally, consider renaming the training section to "skills" and adding more hard skills at the bottom of your resume. Best of luck.
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27 October 2008, 11:53 AM
I think you would be best of with a one page resume. Further, try re organizing your resume to list the following sections in this order: Work experience, education and skills. You have a very large list of skills on page two. Try to condense that to include only those kills most relevant to your potential employer. Also, I think you should remove the qualifications section up front or make it much smaller. Take a loot at some top rated resumes on Razume for a better idea of what works well for your overall structure. Best of luck.
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27 October 2008, 11:47 AM
At this stage, your resume looks to be more in draft format, but you've got the basics in place. Your 4.0 GPA is a strong point and your eduction section is correctly placed on top, given you've just graduated. I would move skills to the bottom in improve your work experience section. Take a loot at some top rated resumes on Razume for a better idea of what works well for that section. Best of luck.
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27 October 2008, 11:44 AM
I think you have a great resume overall. My one concern is with the sabbatical section. It draws a lot of attention given that it's right up front. You might want to leave it out and explain it later when asked by an employer. Be sure to ask other recruiters you're in contact with regarding best practices for listing sabbatical periods. Best of luck.
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27 October 2008, 11:41 AM
Overall, a good looking resume with a very specific focus. Because of your specific focus, I would be sure to get feedback on your resume from others in your industry (simply use the "email this resume" box on the right of your resume). Also, you should remove the references section and considering breaking out education to a separate section. Best of luck.
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27 October 2008, 11:38 AM
Nice resume, but your formatting could be improved. Try opening the margins on the page. That way you will fit everything on one page and look more professional. Also, make sure to add dates to your education section--a common mistake I've seen with resumes on Razume.
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27 October 2008, 11:36 AM
Good looking resume. My only suggestion would be to list accomplishments in multiple bullet points. Having large blocks of text makes finding key information difficult for employers.
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27 October 2008, 11:34 AM
Your content is good, but your format, particularly your font, looks unprofessional. Stick with something more traditional, like times new roman. Look at some top rated resumes on Razume for examples of what works well. Also, make sure to list accomplishments in bullet format, not paragraphs and remove the references part at the bottom (keep to one page if possible). Best of luck.
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27 October 2008, 11:31 AM
Overall, a nice looking resume. A few points for improvement: add dates for your education section (very important), also keep formatting consistent from section to section. Lastly, you don't need the "highlights" section. Simply add your outstanding GPA to your education section. A resume is a summary, it does not require a additional summary.
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27 October 2008, 11:22 AM
Your format needs the most work here, then focus on improving your bullet points. Also, I don't really see value in the AKS font at the top. Keep things traditional. Look at some top rated resumes on Razume for examples of what works well for bullet point language. Make sure to add much more detail. Best of luck.
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27 October 2008, 11:20 AM
Your work experience and education are impressive, but I would consider another way to present yourself. Long paragraphs of text do not work well on resumes. Also, make sure to list the dates for your education and move your education section below work history if you have already been in the workforce for a while. Look at some top rated resumes on Razume for examples of what works well for bullet point layouts. Best of luck.
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27 October 2008, 11:18 AM
Daniel, great to hear you got the internship! Overall, your resume looks very good. Only thing I would consider is shortening the skills section or breaking it out on its own. Otherwise, be sure to share your knowledge with other on Razume when you have time. A number of job seekers could benefit from what you know.
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27 October 2008, 11:15 AM
Consider changing your bullet format to something more traditional and look to keep your resume to one page. Also, include an education section. Look at some top rated resumes on Razume for examples of what works well. Best of luck.
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27 October 2008, 11:11 AM
Great looking resume. Consider improving your bullet points by adding numerical values. Also, make sure to add dates to your education section. Best of luck.
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24 October 2008, 11:36 PM
You have put in a impressive amount of time with BofA--nice work. Overall, you have a good format and structure. Consider enhancing your bullet points with numerical values showing your accomplishments. Best of luck.
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24 October 2008, 11:33 PM
Patricia, consider adding more numerical values to your bullet points and beefing up your skills section. Overall, your work experience looks good, but make sure to request some reviews from those working in your industry.
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24 October 2008, 11:30 PM
The biggest problem are your blocks of text describing your work experience. Try listing one sentence bullet-points, which will make reading your resume easier for employers. Take a look at some top rated resumes on Razume for examples. Also, try to keep your resume to one page.
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24 October 2008, 11:29 PM
The second resume you've posted comes across better. I'd focus on moving some of the sections around. For example, move education below work experience (once you've graduated) and list skills and test scores at the bottom. Best of luck.
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24 October 2008, 11:26 PM
Make sure to have one section for "work experience" with all prior positions. It looks like you've listed two separate sections. Also, it's best to have bullet points rather than blocks of text. Look at some top rated resumes on Razume for examples of what works best.
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24 October 2008, 11:17 PM
Consider moving exams section below experience and education. Overall, a nice resume here. You have great experience and excellent grades. I'm sure others on Razume would benefit from your knowledge. Feel free to share what you know with others.
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24 October 2008, 11:10 PM
Overall, I think your resume needs a lot of work. You should focus on keeping it to one page, two at the most. Expand the margin to fit more text on each page. Also, spend some time looking at top rated resumes on Razume for an idea of what works well. Your work experience bullet points need the most work. Add more details and us numerical values to describe experience. Best of luck.
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24 October 2008, 10:28 PM
Overall, nice work. I would consider moving your education section to the bottom, now that you've graduated and start with work experience. Also, consider keeping it to one page, although not required.
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24 October 2008, 10:26 PM
Valerie, sorry to hear about your current situation. I think you can improve your resume by adding more details in work history, removing your objective statement and adding a skills section. Also, you must list education. Your resume seems like more of a rough draft, so make sure to spend time on Razume looking at top rated resumes for ideas. Best of luck.
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3 September 2008, 10:49 PM
Not bad for your first resume, better than some resumes showing years of experience! You've obviously done a lot of work for SBUX, which is good, but woud be nice to see some diversity in your employer choice in the future. ALso remove the professional profile, and possibly the summary.
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3 September 2008, 10:46 PM
Work experience section is lacking meat. Looks like a draft resume at this stage. Also objective does nothing for you, remove it. And remove the references. This resume needs some work.
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3 September 2008, 10:39 PM
You really know how to write a resume. Well quantified bullet language, good format and flow, excellent presentation of skills. I would hire you if I was a recruiter in your field. 2 things, keep it to one page and remove the references part.
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3 September 2008, 10:37 PM
Salary might be a bit high for certain, high-growth/startups looking for e-commerce professionals, but maybe I'm wrong. Overall, good experience, but should be kept to 2 pages max.
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3 September 2008, 10:35 PM
I'm not familiar with the employer names, but the look impressive. I would suggest a new format, one that is more professional. Also, consider removing the strengths. ONly focus the bottom portion on hard skills, not soft skills like "responsible" and "hard working". Those soft skills are expected and will be vetted in the interview process.
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3 September 2008, 10:32 PM
For a non-traditional format, it looks pretty good. Only problem is the margin on the left is too far in, so you don't have enough room to state all of your achievements. Widen the margin, add more bullets and either remove coursework and change it to a Skills section or simply add more relevant courses--it look a little empty at the bottom.
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3 September 2008, 10:29 PM
The experience is very strong, but I'm not a fan of the format. You should certainly only have 2 pages max and remove the quote on the front. Further, reconsider some of those thick text paragraphs you have in front, I pretty much skipped over that at first glance.
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3 September 2008, 10:24 PM
Coming from a financial firm in the US, I can tell you need to quantify your bullet language much more. Add numerical values to stress your achievements in each position you've held. Blocks of text do not stand out, esp when you're applying for positions that involve finance.
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3 September 2008, 10:22 PM
The beginning profile is WAY to big, a major turn-off for many employers. Take it down to one sentence max as an objective or remove. Also, given you've recently graduated, you should have a one page CV (at least that should be the case for US based jobs)
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3 September 2008, 10:20 PM
The biggest problem I see is the fact you list large bios for each company. I would remove those paragraphs as they detract from the information/achievements you put together based on your personal experience with each company. If a recruiter wants a company bio, they will check out our prior employers websites.
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3 September 2008, 10:12 PM
Although I know the US investment banking market better than that in the UK, I can tell you need to quantify your bullet point language if you want to construct a compelling resume. Specifically in this market, it will be tough to get hired in Ibanking with out a top notch application.
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3 September 2008, 09:54 PM
You really should keep this to two pages max. The section up front does explain your change from real estate elsewhere, BUT, it's much much too long. Stay brief, use your cover letter for more information. Best of luck.
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3 September 2008, 09:52 PM
You have good experience and excellent skills, but don't tell a compelling story with your bullet points. Use numerical values to state what you achieved and list more bullets for recent positions, fewer going down. It shows career progression.
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3 September 2008, 09:50 PM
Not a bad start, but you need much more meat in your work experience section. Try looking at top rated resumes for examples. Also list a date range for your education.
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3 September 2008, 09:48 PM
Nicely done here. Six sigma is very impressive. Consider changing "relevant experience" to "work experience", but that's a minor change.
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3 September 2008, 09:47 PM
You need to list much more detail here if you want to impress employers. Best of luck with your next draft.
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3 September 2008, 09:46 PM
This resume is very well constructed. I think you might want to try for one page if possible and you could add more numerical values in your language, but otherwise I like it. Nice work!
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2 September 2008, 10:21 PM
The content here is pretty good. You could have a nicer format, especially as a graphic artist, but traditional formats also work well for everyone. You have an interesting situation given the HOH, but it should not be a factor in your candidacy for jobs. It's probably something to mention in interviews, but not something to be said on cover letters or resumes.
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2 September 2008, 10:18 PM
The format need a lot of work. I would go with something more traditional. Also shorten up the profile section and try to get everything down to one page. Otherwise the language is pretty good.
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2 September 2008, 10:16 PM
The intro section of this resume is way too long. You should bring everything down to one page for maximum effectiveness. Consider starting with work experience. Keep in mind your resume is a summary so a summary section is not necessary.
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2 September 2008, 10:15 PM
Consider a different format and make sure to add more details to your work history section.
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1 September 2008, 11:34 AM
Given you're not in college yet, it's understandable you don't have all the work experience you'll have in the next few years. At this stage, I would focus on finding a new format and building out bullet points for your activities and work experience. Try to look at top rated resumes on Razume for a better idea of what works well. Best of luck and let us know how the college application process turns out.
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1 September 2008, 11:31 AM
Good resume here. You might want to work on getting a one page version as well. Cut out the objective, remove some bullet points and keep things concise. Otherwise, very well constructed.
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31 August 2008, 11:56 AM
You should cut out the large paragraphs at the top and middle of the first page. Try starting with Employment and getting things to 2 pages. Further, you list too many bullet points for each position. Best to be concise.
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29 August 2008, 11:03 AM
Your language and format need some work. You should aim for a one page resume and revise the work history section to reflect a more traditional approach. To be honest, I had a hard time picking up on where you worked an what you achieved. Keep it simple with employer name, title then bullets. Don't list subsections like "project". Also, consolidate your skills section at the bottom. Its on top and in the middle, don't list twice.
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29 August 2008, 11:00 AM
You should focus on getting your resume down to one page. Remember, recruiters only spend 7 seconds on average looking at your resume, so keeping it lean is in your best interest. That means you should avoid lengthy paragraphs like the one on top--as a former recruiter, I can tell you that's a big turn off. Further list out items in bullet format. Take a look at some top rated resumes for examples, best of luck.
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29 August 2008, 10:51 AM
Nice work here. Would be good to see more information on your work experience, it looks a little lite. Try to add more bullets on recent internships/positions, fewer going down. Excellent GPA as well.
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29 August 2008, 10:48 AM
Impressive academic background, but could use some work on your work experience section. Try removing some items from extra curricular and fully expanding your employment with bullet points for each employer. Remember to list more bullet points for more recent/relevant employment. Maybe call last section extra curricular/skills
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28 August 2008, 04:19 PM
You've made some noticeable improvements here--nice work! As I mentioned before, I like what you've done with your resume and suggest you keep following up with contacts who can help you place your resumes on the right desks at the companies your pursuing.
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28 August 2008, 04:14 PM
You've selected a great format and present your experience well. At first glance it doesn't seem like the culinary arts degree holds any relevance to IT Product Mgmt, so consider taking it off. Additionally move your education section below the work section if you've graduated and already held a full-time position, which is looks like you have. On the objective, I personally don't like them (would rather save that info for cover letters/emails). If you do include one, make sure you write it from the perspective of the employer and not only what position you're looking for. (If you're going to take up that valuable real estate on your resume with an objective make sure you focus on solving the employers problems before your own).
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28 August 2008, 12:25 PM
Interesting you haven't heard back from IBM or Accenture. I think you're resume is pretty good. You can improve the format by keeping the bullets consistent and not having those check marks. Also, it would be good if you could add one additional work experience position, generally good to have a minimum of three if possible. Lastly and most importantly, I think you should stress your technology background with fewer bullets that are achievement oriented--show what you've done through numerical values. From that point, keep following up with recruiters and contacts you have at those companies. I'm sure you'll get your foot in the door with your past experience.
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28 August 2008, 10:17 AM
I agree with the other comments, less block paragraph text will make your resume more readable to recruiters. Further, I'd turn that personal section at the bottom into a skills section. Your key results/bullets are well constructed--nice work.
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28 August 2008, 10:06 AM
It looks like you have a tremendous amount of work experience as a promotions producer in TV news. I'd suggest keeping your resume to one page by removing the references at the bottom and significantly reducing the size of your professional profile (you might even want to replace the profile section with a skills section at the bottom). The big selling point is your experience and that should take center stage. For your education section I would remove the word "online" as you earned your degree from the institution just like those who attended classes in person. I would also change your format here to "school, degree type" to make it clear which degree you pursued at each university.
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28 August 2008, 09:58 AM
You have a really well constructed resume. I see very little that needs to be changed. I would reach out to experts in your industry to determine what can be tweaked, but overall, it's very good.
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28 August 2008, 09:48 AM
Nicely done. A great format and relevant content to urban planning positions. Consider building out a separate skills section at the bottom to highlight your hard/computer skills. Excellent list of schools you've attended.
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28 August 2008, 09:43 AM
I think you have a great format and some solid content. You should consider taking out the profile portion up top and add more hard skills/computer skills at the bottom. Further, consider having more bullet points for recent positions (the CIO position) and fewer as you go down. That will show career progression. Overall, nicely done.
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28 August 2008, 09:32 AM
Very nice skills section at the bottom, caught my eye right away. On formatting, I think you should broaden the page on the left and fill in more information for your work experience section. You have the media focus in your education, but need to show more relevant achievements to publishing/radio in your bullet points, if possible. Also, consider removing the "career focus" section or rephrasing to focus on what the recruiter wants to hear, not what you'd like to become. (for example, something like: provide an organization focusing on under served communities with _______ using my strengths of _______). I'm not really big on objectives, but sometimes people make them work.
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28 August 2008, 09:23 AM
As a former recruiter in financial services, I think you need to add a skills section to highlight your talents. Consider removing some of the leadership/volunteer area to make room for a skills section while keeping everything to one page. Also, remove your high school information unless you're applying for jobs near your home town. Otherwise things look good, but you'll need to bring your A game to get a job in this tough employment market.
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28 August 2008, 09:18 AM
It would be best to keep your resume to one page given your level of experience and recent graduate status. To fit everything in, I would remove either the professional profile or objective, the references portion and your high school information at the bottom. BTW, excellent GPA!
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28 August 2008, 09:14 AM
Excellent GPA and school, but you could use some more work on your Work Experience section. See some top rated resumes in your field for an example of how to best present your work achievements. To start, you should list 3 to 4 relevant positions with detailed bullet points.
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28 August 2008, 09:03 AM
You certainly have a great wealth of experience from the last 25 years. It might also be helpful to prepare a shorter version around 2 pages to highlight key positions, achievements, education and skills. For example, I think you can leave out the references at the beginning and the quote at the end. Further, rather than a separate section for notable achievements, it might help to work in those numerical achievements to each position you held--a more traditional approach, but could be helpful for a shorter version.
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28 August 2008, 08:56 AM
Excellent resume! You've certainly done your homework on drafting quality resumes. One question: why do you have so few bullet points for your top position? I suggest having the most bullets on top fewer going down to show career progress and increased responsibility with each new position.
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28 August 2008, 08:54 AM
This is a good start here, but you can make a number of improvements. First, you need to solidify your work experience into one section. Program Development and Volunteer experience should all be under "Work Experience". Further, keep your bullets consistent from position to position--meaning you should have a similar number of bullets for each position and the length of each bullet should be relatively similar. Also, nice work with your skills section--you keep it to the point and focus on hard skills.
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28 August 2008, 08:46 AM
The thing that really sticks out is the lack of work experience listed on your resume. Your degree is great for ops mgmt, but even thought you're just graduating you'll want to improve the work history section. For starters, list this section before skills and under education. Try to list at least 3 prior positions, internships, volunteering you've done and built out bullet points for each.
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28 August 2008, 08:36 AM
Although your resume is wordy at times, the content is very good. Your academic achievements are impressive and you have great work experience. Not coming from your field I have a limited ability to critique your content, but I see you've done a nice job providing insight to others--nice work!
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28 August 2008, 12:21 AM
Excellent format. I'd change the personal section to skills and focus on computer skills or other hard skills. Also add more meat to your bullet points, including numerical values. Those values are especially key for management consulting. Lastly move your education section down below work section--you've already graduated and joined the work force.
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27 August 2008, 11:33 PM
Very interesting approach with the logos. Certainly makes each company brand stand out. You have a similar approach to this resume, although they only show one logo: http://razume.com/documents/2549 For comments, I think you're spot on with your bullet language. Very well quantified with numerical values--others should pick up on your excellent language. You might also want to add a skills section--my only substantial comment really. BTW, what exactly is Corporate Investigation? If it's as interesting as it sounds--maybe I'm in the wrong line of work!
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27 August 2008, 11:00 PM
I 100% agree with Woadan, providing figures will make a world of difference. Also consider moving your technical skills to the bottom. Although important, recruiters want to see you work experience on top.
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27 August 2008, 10:49 PM
Great look and feel of your resume--I like what I see. You can however improve a few areas starting with your bullet point language. You don't use any numerical values to highlight your experience, so nothing really stands out except the brands. Brands are good, but would look better with $ amounts, etc. Also remove the Registered Trademark signs--very distracting. On the structure of your resume, I will list just one section for "skills" and not the mgmt/technical experience part. Lastly, remove the references portion. If recruiters want references, they will ask.
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27 August 2008, 10:36 PM
Overall, you've done a good job here. Only major comment is that you should have a one page resume based on your level of experience and desired salary range. Consider removing the strengths section or incorporating it into a skills section list at the bottom. Also, once you get your first full-time position after your Master degree, make sure you move your education section below work experience. Lastly, consider quantifying your bullet points more--meaning you should show achievements with numerical values, $ amounts, etc.
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27 August 2008, 10:02 PM
Very impressive educational background and work experience. You could restructure to have education moved down and only one Work experience section. No need for the work summary section. Also consider converting the "profile" section into skills and moving that to the bottom of everything. Otherwise, looks pretty good.
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27 August 2008, 09:56 PM
Nice improvements here compared to the first draft. Could be shortened to 1 page, 2 at a maximum.
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27 August 2008, 06:49 PM
Both Work Experience (employers) and Education should be listed on the first page. From the first look I couldn't find either. The structure of your resume needs a lot of work. Look at some top rated resumes for examples.
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27 August 2008, 03:42 PM
Very impressive. Only comments: consider moving skills section to the bottom rather than in the summary portion. Also, once you get your first full time job after the MBA, move education down below work experience.
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27 August 2008, 03:37 PM
Although the market for financial positions is tough, you should have more success if you add more details to your work experience section. As a former recruiter, I can tell you that you don't have enough "meat" in your bullet points. Be sure to use numbers to describe your achievements, especially in finance. Also the core competencies section isn't doing all that much and consider keeping everything to one page. Look at some top rated finance resumes for examples.
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27 August 2008, 03:16 PM
Justin, interesting approach, not traditional, but could work for your industry for certain employers. Also check out this resume: http://razume.com/documents/1915 Not as polished as yours, but good use of flair. Some comments: you should consider replacing the experience section with "skills" and removing any summary paragraphs. It's ok to use a different format, but you need to make sure to keep your content more traditional, otherwise recruiters will not find what they're looking for.
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27 August 2008, 02:17 PM
All your great info in the summary section should be listed in a "Skills" section at the bottom. You can start your resume off with Work Experience. Further, you might want to cut out the older/least relevant experience and keep your resume to one page. Will help recruiters browsing resumes. Lastly, where's your education section (recruiters will ask)?
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27 August 2008, 02:13 PM
A few things: 1) Try moving your skills section to the bottom. You might have more luck with the following structure: Work Experience, Education, Skills. 2) Remove the references at the bottom. If they want references, they'll ask for them. 3) Very important---remove Web Developer from the top of your resume. Your resume should start with your name, not position or industry group. 4) Lastly, turn all of your text paragraphs into bullets. Specifically the paragraphs for Work Experience. Otherwise, your skills are very good and best of luck!
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27 August 2008, 01:26 PM
Format is really good, looks similar to my own. To get it on one page, might try uploading a PDF version. I would get rid of the objective, it adds no value. Also move education section below work experience. Lastly, consider adding more information about your experience in HR--nothing jumps out right away. Otherwise, nice work.
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27 August 2008, 01:22 PM
Great format and very impressive work experience. Consider removing objective or summary, both are not needed. Also, add dates to the right side of your education section and remove references at bottom.
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27 August 2008, 01:19 PM
Overall, you do have great content on your resume. Very impressive. I think things fall apart in the mixture of bullets and paragraphs. Stick with bullets only to describe work history items. It is much easier for recruiters to skim bullets compared to reading paragraphs. That being said, I think you quantify your existing bullets well (good use of numerical values)--nice work. Also, Consider removing the profile information at the top and keeping your resume to one page.
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27 August 2008, 12:20 PM
Damie, thanks for the detailed explanation of your situation. In this tough job market, it's important to consider the key reasons why your application might get over looked. I see a few areas you can improve you language and presentation. Best of luck.
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12 August 2008, 12:43 PM
Although you're at a director level position, consider removing the profile section and keeping things to one page. Also, keep your bullet format consistent with plain round bullets.
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12 August 2008, 12:40 PM
Very qualified for your roles in IS. I would also consider building a one page resume to highlight your skills. Consider moving skills section down to the bottom.
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5 August 2008, 09:40 PM
Very impressive resume. Language is well quantified and work experience certainly expansive enough for two pages. Keep up the great work. Others should take notes
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5 August 2008, 07:50 PM
The format needs a lot of work, but overall, the structure is not bad. I would try and keep it to one page if possible. Otherwise make sure it's not more than 2 at the very most!
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3 August 2008, 11:36 PM
Good you are able to get it down from five pages, but two pages is still too long here. You will be much better off with just one page. The best way to shorten things up will be removing some of that training information. Consider having one 4-5 line section for skills/training rather than listing out every training you've attended. The key is to capture the main skills from those trainings, not to simply state you attend. Also consider removing the objective. it's too long and does not add value.
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1 August 2008, 10:50 AM
You have a great work experience and educational history, but you should consider creating a one page version of your resume. Unless you're a seasoned executive, more than one page is detrimental. If I'm looking for a quick glance of your credentials, I have no way of getting the full picture until I get to page 3. For the one page resume, you have everything in the right order: Work Experience, Education, Skills. It's just a matter of shortening things up in the work history section.
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31 July 2008, 01:39 PM
Nice format, but you need to work in your content. First thing, high school information has to go. Second, consider listing more work history items, or at least adding more bullet points. Lastly you need a skills section. Computer/Language are key.
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29 July 2008, 11:44 AM
Overall, not bad start, but you need much more detail for your work experience section. Take a look at some top rated resumes for examples of what works well. Additionally, move the qualifications section down to the bottom and title it skills. You need to show strength from your work history, which is a little light, but can improved with more detail. Your skills section is also important, specifically hard skills (computers, languages, etc.)
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29 July 2008, 11:37 AM
Great improvement here from your prior drafts. First off, you need to add a date for your education section. After graduation and first full time job, move education down below work history. Also try to quantify your bullet points more. Numbers, amounts of time, just more numerical values will help.
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28 July 2008, 03:47 PM
A good resume overall, needs some more experience before consideration by major Investment banks. Consider working in brokerage for a summer internship or something like that. Also you need to improve your skills section, it's lacking substance.
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28 July 2008, 11:59 AM
I think this resume is really more of a first draft. It is lacking the level of detail that will be needed by employers. I would start by filling out the employment section with much more achievement oriented details. Then work on getting the computer skills section in better shape.
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27 July 2008, 10:48 AM
Not a bad start, but the biggest missing piece is your work experience. Make sure you get a few internships in government/politics in the next few years/semesters. Also, time to remove high school information and replace it with college-level achievements.
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27 July 2008, 10:40 AM
Great looking resume. Starting with your objective, your language is focused on the right audience--the employer. Most people have poorly written objectives that focus on what they want. Refreshing to see the right approach. Also well constructed bullet points with LOTS of quantified information. Your resume serves as a good example for others. I have a few minor comments (keep date formats standard and consider adding bold font skills section), but otherwise excellent work!
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22 July 2008, 08:13 PM
Overall, a very nice resume. You have clearly exhibited expertise in your field and present your experience with quantified, achievement oriented bullets. Good to see you've fit everything on one page. Many of your colleagues with similar levels of expertise will push for 2 pages--a detrimental to impressing recruiters/others quickly.
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22 July 2008, 08:05 PM
I agree, you're a very light on details and should list overall GPA. Make sure to include other work experience positions, which can include unpaid positions you have listed in leadership. Recruiters will be interested to see at least 3 positions under Experience (can be paid or unpaid).
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22 July 2008, 08:01 PM
Kcolker, you have a really nice looking resume. Your content is good as well but could improve the overall flow. For example, your work experience is too cluttered. I would only keep 4 or 5 positions and show more bullet points for most recent/relevant positions, fewer going down. Also, after you get your first fill time job, you should move education below work experience. Nice work, best of luck!
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19 July 2008, 02:09 PM
It's not 100% clear what you'd like to do next with your career, but I do like your resume. Be sure to message back or update your profile with some information about your career goals. Few suggestions, consider moving Education below Work Experience, now that you've graduated. Also, consider presenting your "travel" section differently. If you were on some sort of program or did any type of work, would be good to list out. Best of luck.
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16 July 2008, 10:46 PM
After recently leaving the world of Big 4, I can tell you that it's a tough market in financial services right now, but I think your resume has what it takes, with a few minor improvements. 1) You need to quantify your resume bullet language much more (look at my resume as an example--every other line lists numerical achievements--very important for financial services/accounting). 2) Seeing how you've already graduated, you should shift Education down below Work Experience. 3) Add GPA if above 3.0 or 3.5 or other meat to the education section. Win any awards, participate in any finance oriented clubs? Other than that, looks great. Be sure to help others on their resumes, as you clearly know what you are doing. Best of luck!
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16 July 2008, 09:26 AM
Off the bat, I noticed you don't have a date for your education. When did you graduate or have you graduated yet? Top priority would be adding in the date. Also, consider removing your summary of qualifications. Start with Education if still in school otherwise, start with Work Experience. Your resume is a summary, you don't need that section. Lastly, you have a good skills section, but consider moving it to the bottom.
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12 July 2008, 04:43 PM
Overall a very well constructed resume. You clearly know what you're doing and it's great to see you share your knowledge with others in the community. A few minor comments: 1) To stay consistent, don't have tiers of bullets (see highlights for details). 2) Consider removing an older position or two and adding more substance to your skills/credentials section.
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11 July 2008, 03:38 PM
Marcos, consider bringing your resume down to one page. You will have much more success with recruiters. Additionally, you need to reconfigure your education section. Remove high school information and list your MA first then BA second. You have some strong content, but need to work on the presentation. Best of luck.
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11 July 2008, 01:10 PM
Andrassy, I like what you've done so far. Any more information you can provide about the type of Gov't internship you're looking to get? Specific agencies would be helpful when providing feedback. Few comments, but overall good. Make sure to help your friends out by sharing your resume writing knowledge.
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7 July 2008, 07:13 PM
Nice improvement here. Now that you have your structure in order, consider improving the work experience section. To me, it's confusing to have Employment history, Professional experience and Educational experience. I think you should have just two categories instead 1) Work Experience (that includes your last 3-4 positions held, which can be paid or volunteer) and 2) Activities/Leadership. Also, make sure you use bullet points, for your work history, it will look much more professional.
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7 July 2008, 05:32 PM
Weiss, you have some good experience with the NRCC, but you need to highlight it further. Don't treat all work experience the same, rather give yourself more bullets for the most recent experience and less going down the page. See my resume as an example. Also, make sure to list you education section first, as you're still in school. Best of luck and be sure to keep this draft up when you post your next draft so others can see the changes.
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7 July 2008, 05:20 PM
Emsily, I nice start with your resume. Off the bat, I see you can improve the overall presentation by having all sections justified to the left. Additionally, consider structuring your resume sections in this order: Education, Work Experience, Activities/Awards and Skills. Check out some top rated resumes for a better idea of what works for your field of interest.
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25 June 2008, 04:29 PM
Nice work with your resume. I have a few questions about your locations and profile, but otherwise looks great. I'm sure you'd have some excellent advice to others looking for jobs in the corporate finance industry.
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20 June 2008, 10:31 AM
Nick, nice work here. Really impressive PR resume. I'd suggest adding more quantified, action oriented content in your bullet points. Also, once you get your first full-time job (which it looks like you might have with FH), you'll want to move Education below work experience. Lastly, consider adding a skills section at the bottom of your resume to replace the coursework section. Be sure to share your knowledge about resume writing with others in PR!
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19 June 2008, 09:03 PM
I agree with Ras on this one, you have a few spelling/grammatical errors, but very impressive stats. Consider keeping it to one or two pages. Otherwise it looks great. Nice work.
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15 June 2008, 12:01 AM
I agree with Miriam, your resume needs a substantial amount of work. Take a look at some top rated resumes to get a better picture of what works well for your career field. Best of luck.
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13 June 2008, 06:21 PM
Brandon, you have a good start to your resume, but you'll need to fill in the details to create a compelling store to recruiters. Take some time to review the format and content on top rates resumes. Once you put together your next draft, be sure to keep the first draft posted to allow reviewers to see your changes.
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12 June 2008, 08:54 AM
Justin, an interesting approach to resume writing. But given this is more of a marketing document, how has this format been received by the market? What do people say about it? If it works well, consider sharing this with others on Razume.
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9 June 2008, 11:58 PM
Peppy, you really have some outstanding experience for the financial world. To have two investment banks under work history is impressive. Obviously you'll want to fill in the details for Credit Suisse, once you get exposure to the position. Additionally, you may want to consider a more traditional format. Clearly this resume has been working well for you, but certain recruiters may think differently. Anyway, be sure to share your knowledge with others, you really know what you're doing to land top level finance jobs. Nice work!
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8 June 2008, 11:03 AM
Andre, impressive resume here. I'm not sure where you've worked given you removed the information, but I can tell that you've held a number of exciting positions. My only comments would be to limit some of the academic items you are showing and increase the focus on your work experience. I agree with you to keep education first, but recruiters will ultimately be interested in the work experience that differentiates you from the rest. Best of luck.
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20 May 2008, 01:40 PM
Jenice, you have solid work experience with progressively professional language. You clearly know how to structure your resume, but could improve the level of detail in your bullet point language. Additionally, the summary section is very useful, but should be applied to your skills section. Lastly, consider increasing the margins on your page. Filling the page more fully will make your candidacy appear more professional at first glance. Also, it would be helpful if you provided more details in your profile regarding the type of company or organization you're looking to join. Best of luck.
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16 May 2008, 03:43 PM
Sjurak, I agree with KL, you need to keep your resume to one page. Additionally, consider reworking your experience section. Focus bullet points to describe your work history rather than blocks of text. Also keep your emphasis for those bullets on achievements, not simply your job responsibilities. For a high school student you have some great experience and skills. Many of your peers don't even have a resume, so nice work. Try emulating the format /content on some top rated resumes on Razume. Best of luck.
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16 May 2008, 03:29 PM
KL, I think you have a really great resume with excellent experience for the nonprofit sector. Given I'm not currently involved with that sector, I'd encourage you to send this link to your friends and request more content specific feedback as you apply for jobs. Someone currently working in the position you are looking to obtain would work best. Regarding your format and overall presentation, I think you've done a great job. I have a few minor comments. Best of luck.
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14 May 2008, 02:44 PM
AJW, very impressive resume. I don't have the technical background to adequately review the content of your resume, but I can provide you some advice on your presentation and format. I suggest sending this link to a few peers in your field and request additional review. Also, be sure to spread you knowledge to others in your field.
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14 May 2008, 02:21 PM
Ying, your resume looks very similar to PChoi's: http://razume.com/resume/view/1333 It looks like you've used the same format. On the formatting side, please see Choi's resume for comments. On the content side, see my reviews on top of your resume. Best of luck.
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13 May 2008, 04:59 PM
Rugiatu, I think you have a good start here, but can polish your language and presentation to put your most professional foot forward. Consider changing the headers to have the following, in this order: "Education", "Work Experience", then "Leadership" or "Skills" or both. Right now, you show two or three employment sections, which is confusing to those evaluating your resume. Also, I don't think the "objective" adds value and I would remove the references request at the bottom. Best of luck with your job search. Let us know how it turns out!
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13 May 2008, 04:50 PM
I agree with the prior comment, you should really have bullet points to make it easier for the reader. Concise, quantified bullet points are much more effective than detailed paragraphs. Additionally, now that you've graduated, it's time to move your education section below work history. Further, keep a consistent format for all sections. See my resume for example. Best of luck and be sure to share you knowledge with others in our community.
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13 May 2008, 04:35 PM
Joseph, I think you have a strong background for the finance/investment management world. As you mentioned, you need to move The Henry Fund items to work experience. Additionally, I'd suggest taking greater emphasis away from your education and more towards work experience. I would also add a skills section at the bottom where you currently have "additional information". Best of luck and be sure to share your knowledge with others in the community.
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25 April 2008, 08:50 AM
WindyCity, I think you have a good start, but you're right a number of improvements can be made. On the overall structure, you should consider moving education below work history, now that you've graduated. Also, make sure to add a skills section. Especially for finance/investment banking, a skills section in key. See my other comments, best of luck and be sure to share your knowledge by reviewing a few other resumes on Razume.
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21 April 2008, 01:38 PM
Laura, not a bad start here. I very much like the format and your work experience. Now that you've graduated consider moving your education section below work history, that is standard. Also, consider improving your bullet point language. In accounting specifically, you'll need to quantify your experience much more. Think of action oriented phrases with specific, quantified achievements: "manged X number of people to achieve Y result". Also remove the objective, save it for your cover letter. Best of luck and be sure to share your knowledge on Razume.
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11 April 2008, 09:52 PM
Jpo, really impressive resume here. You have a nice clean format and excellent academic background. I think you can improve upon your language in your "Work Experience" section and also quantify your bullet points more fully. Specifically for econ/finance jobs, you should consider enhancing your skill section to include more stat related applications. Overall, great work. Be sure to share your knowledge with others at UMass and on Razume.
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9 April 2008, 09:01 AM
Butters, I think you've done an excellent job improving your resume. As I mentioned to Daniel a few resumes up, I would not focus too much on the ratings at this point. Resume writing is more art than science, therefore, it's not always easy to quantify the value of each resume. You've also collected feedback from your university career center, which is a good step. In addition, try emailing this link to others in IR and requesting reviews. You can use the "email this resume box" next to your resume. Best of luck.
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9 April 2008, 08:56 AM
Daniel, I think you've done an excellent job improving your resume. I would not focus too much on the ratings at this point. Resume writing is more art than science, therefore, it's not always so easy to quantify the value of each resume. None the less, try emailing this link to other and requesting reviews. You can use the "email this resume box" next to your resume. It will be particularly helpful to get other Australians familiar with your educational system to provide feedback. Request reviews from those who have resume writing knowledge as well as professionals in the consulting field. Best of luck.
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9 April 2008, 08:50 AM
Nice work on your resume. Your prior summer internship makes a major difference for your candidacy for the fall. L'Oreal position gives you a great opportunity going forward. Best of luck with your summer plans, make the most out of it by gaining technical skills in finance/accounting if possible. Think strategically about what you'd want to do in the fall. What type of skills can you gain this summer that will help you achieve your goals? Nice work and be sure to share your knowledge with others at GW and on Razume.
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9 April 2008, 08:40 AM
Elanie, very professionally written resume. Nice work. I have a few comments which you can see. Mostly, I think you need to put more emphasis on your Work experience, rather than summary. Bellsouth Corp M&A experience looks very impressive, that was the first thing that jumped out at me. If you have time, be sure to share you knowledge by reviewing other resumes on Razume. You have a lot to contribute and people will gain a lot from your help. Best of luck.
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7 April 2008, 11:28 PM
Ahmad, I agree with the other comments, your resume needs some work. I would not suggest showing your picture and be sure to block your personal contact information when uploading to Razume. Use top rated resumes on Razume as a guide. Best of luck.
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4 April 2008, 07:58 AM
KCut, your resume shows a lot of promise from your academic achievement and work history. That being said, film/television is difficult to break into and unlike many fields, resumes don't hold as much weight as connections. Given you're at UCLA, you should have an opportunity to network with the right people. Overall, I think your resume is right where you want it, I just have a few minor suggestions. Best of luck and be sure to share your knowledge with others as many in your career field have difficulty drafting quality resumes like yours.
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4 April 2008, 07:33 AM
As a general rule, if you're still in school, you should keep your Education section at the top. Once you've obtained your first post-college position, then you should move Education below Work Experience. Nice work with your resume. Excellent work history, impressive academics and Very professional presentation. I have some minor comments, nothing big. I encourage you to share your knowledge with others on Razume, given your high level understanding of professional branding and resume writing. Best of luck.
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3 April 2008, 08:47 AM
Tashad, you bring up a good question about your year off, thanks for the specifics on your question. I'm still a little unclear as to when you graduated from UofW (great school BTW). Be sure to list a range of dates that you attended the school. Regarding your question, I suggest creating a position under "Work Experience" that states "Served as volunteer doing _________". Although you're volunteering, you can still add this item into your experience section. If you have more work experience to list, then I would consider leaving it off your experience section, listing it under skills, if you speak Spanish at all. Given you're fresh from college, a one year trip is easy to explain. What's not as easy to explain is the lack of work experience on your resume. Your strategy would be to network with the right people and get your foot in the door with an internship in Seattle. I suggest using your network to help you accomplish your goals. Best of luck.
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3 April 2008, 08:36 AM
Nice improvement here. You still have some work to be done in the work experience section (ie: gaining more experience), but overall it's shaping up. Nice work getting feedback from a variety of sources. Not only will you have a better resume as a resume, you'll have a better understanding of how to write a resume in the future. The objective is tricky. If you're sending it out in mass emails, stick with the objective. If you're applying to specific positions with a cover letter, let the letter do the talking. The former is a poor, low-yield strategy, while the latter takes an established network and more time, but is ultimately the best way to go. Just consider your job search strategy here, most people over look that.
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3 April 2008, 08:27 AM
Sana, this is a really well constructed resume. I do see a few areas that could be improved, but overall it's strong. For consulting work, you will have to rely on your network somewhat. You don't have the direct background, but should have enough skills to fill the void. As a general strategy, I would try to quantify your resume much more. For consulting, your analytical skills will be most impressive--you need to make these more clear through your resume language. Best of luck with your MBA program. Be sure to share your knowledge with other on Razume.
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1 April 2008, 07:58 AM
Danny, I like the presentation and approach, but you have to put more work into your content section. Your "Work Experience", which will set you apart or keep you back, should be build like an upside down pyramid. Have more bullet points on the top for the most recent job and fewer going down. With that approach, you will show a smooth progression. To that end, your Sales/Marketing position at the top will be your strongest selling point, so make sure it's as full with detail and numerical values as your World Zionist Congress paragraph. Best of luck.
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31 March 2008, 10:40 PM
Julia, nice work on your resume. One can definitely tell you know what you're doing when it comes to presenting yourself professional. Additionally, you academic performance and work history make you an excellent candidate for a DC/SF position in PR/Communications. My major concern with your resume is your objective. I don't like "entry-level position" as most employers do not us this term anyone. Overall, I suggest scrapping the objective and saving that language for your cover letters. Best of luck with your job search and be sure to share your resume knowledge with others on Razume.com
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31 March 2008, 08:57 AM
Jdolfin, nice work here with your resume. I agree with Ruthless, you need to remove high school information, even though you just started college. For a 2011 grad, you have a good start on your work experience, but need to gain more real-world internships in consulting or engineering. Your Work experience section should be your focus for growth in the near future. See my other comments left. Best of luck and be sure to share your knowledge with others.
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31 March 2008, 08:49 AM
James, I think you have a good start here with your resume, but can make drastic improvements. On the content side, I think you list too much information without enough quantified descriptions. On the formatting side, you fail to package that information in a concise and professional way. I strongly suggest that you prepare a one page resume. It will make you look much more professional. Additionally, I suggest removing your objective and summary. Your resume is in itself a summary (if kept to one page) and therefore does not need an additional summary. Lastly, you need to add a skills section--this is highly important for the IT field! Take a look at some top rated resumes for an idea of what excels in today's job market. Best of luck.
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31 March 2008, 08:37 AM
wwoodroffe, you're resume provides great detail, but is honestly difficult to read. You simply have too many bullet points , making it difficult to determine what's important on your resume. I suggest going with a 1 page resume here, clearing a lot of superfluous information and removing the summary profile and objective sections. Best of luck and be sure to keep in mind that recruiters see a lot of resumes, so there's a premium on brevity.
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28 March 2008, 08:00 AM
DaniNo, the content of your resume is not bad for a 2010 grad, but you will have to enhance your work experience section and reconsider your format/presentation. Prior to redrafting your resume, think about your overall job search strategy. Where do you see yourself in 3 years and how can you use your resume to accomplish your goals? Consider what recruiters want to find on your resume and now what you'd like to tell them. To that end, I would remove the summary section and the interests section. Use the valuable space on your resume to focus on hard skills and achievement oriented work experience. Your current work experience section lacks promise as you have not spent time crafting your bullet points. Turn "Trained new employees", which is a weak bullet into something like "Managed training program for X number of new employees for X result." See additional comments on your resume and best of luck. Be sure to keep your prior draft when posting a second to let members on Razume see your progress.
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28 March 2008, 12:04 AM
I very much like your format here. You've proven you know how to draft a resume well. On the content side, you should aim to improve your GPA. If you're not coming from a target school and you want to get into Ibanking, you'll need to set yourself apart as much as possible. Further, I strongly suggest you network well, especially in this challenging job market. None the less, you still have some time before graduation, so make sure to work on your content and GPA if possible. Additionally, be sure to share your knowledge with others on Razume. Best of luck.
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27 March 2008, 11:41 PM
Hihik, I agree you format is very congested. You need to rework your presentation and open the margins on your text to fill the page more eloquently. Regarding your school as you mentioned on WallStreetOasis, Clark is not a target school for investment banks. None the less, if you network with the right people and improve you job search strategy, you should find greater success. I think you will have a difficult time finding positions at top firms, especially in this bear economy. Figure out your strategy for approaching the job market, you may have more success at IBank feeder positions: brokerage, trustee work, rating agencies, etc. Then if you make the right contacts advance briskly might you find yourself at an IBank. Best of luck.
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26 March 2008, 11:08 PM
Duncan, I agree with Rey's comment. You should not disclose your date of birth or salary information on your resume/CV. Specifically, salary information should NOT be discussed until after they have presented you an offer. This strategy will provide you the most leverage during the negotiation. Additionally, it looks like you are leaning more towards a CV than a resume. Given your UK background, that should work best, although some employers would prefer shorter (1 page) resume style applications. I have a few other comments, but otherwise it looks good. Best of luck.
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23 March 2008, 12:03 PM
Nice improvement on your section organization and format. On the content side you still need to improve your work experience section to break into IBanking. Your academics are your biggest selling point, but you'll need to meet some key people who can help you build your work experience. Keep us posted on your summer plans as your next employer during that time will likely set the stage for future work in finance. Best of luck and be sure to help review other resumes interested in finance on Razume.
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20 March 2008, 08:30 PM
The focus of your resume is off. Your selling point needs to be your education and work experience combination, not leadership. Rethink your strategy, make some connections and get an internship in finance. You're not coming from a target school so you'll never get to a top-level bank unless you build your work experience. Your upcoming summer internship is key. I would suggest brokerage, accounting or trustee work. Many positions have already filled up, so you'll have to get your resume in better shape and keep it moving. I have some suggestions for your resume, be sure to look at top rated finance resumes for an idea of what works for your Work Experience section.
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20 March 2008, 08:03 PM
Mathew, you have some great skills and academic experience to be come a financial engineer. However, you may need to get an internship in finance to gain more traction in that area. With my current profession, I am exposed to cash flow/financial modeling, so I can tell you more or less what's important. Having finance experience is important, but I also work with many individuals with an engineering background. See my suggestions and best of luck.
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20 March 2008, 08:55 AM
You need some work on your resume, but a good start. Try adding more detail and rearranging some of the sections. Be sure to look at top rated resumes here for examples.
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19 March 2008, 09:30 PM
Overall, you have a nice looking resume, but I agree with the other comments. You need to improve your work experience. Best of luck.
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17 March 2008, 11:37 PM
Fireinthesky, very nice improvement over your prior resume. I agree, however, with ruthless, you need to pay more attention to your bullet point details. Exceeding 2006 store sales is not a very clear sentence. Focus on keeping your sentence length consistent. None the less, your format has moved in the right direction. I'd suggest doing some more research by viewing top rated resumes on Razume in your field. Additionally, make sure to request reviews on Razume from knowledgeable peers who could help provide more advice (use the email this resume box to the right of each resume), Best of luck.
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17 March 2008, 01:35 PM
Barry, given you are a recent undergrad graduate, I suggest keeping your resume to one page. Further, make sure to move your education section below your work history now that you've graduated. Best of luck.
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17 March 2008, 12:59 AM
Well done, you really know how to write a resume. I'm sure your knowledge could benefit a lot of people on this site, as most people don't know how to present themselves professional. I have a few comments. Best of luck.
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16 March 2008, 02:19 PM
Peppy, you have great experience from DB, but I think your format is not very traditional. I'm sure you can get a job with this resume, but recruiters will have a much easier time finding the right information if you stick with a standard, more professional format.
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15 March 2008, 06:36 PM
Fireinthesky, if you're looking for green energy company's in DC, I suggest getting in touch with Clear Currents (cleancurrents.com), a Rockville based startup in the green energy space. Also, I've heard SmartPower is hiring (smartpower.org). If you're interested in either opportunity, comment back on my resume and I can put you in touch with a few people I know at those organizations. Before sending your resume in, however, I suggest you make a number of improvements. First off, you need to keep your resume to one page. Second, remove the summary piece and consider adding a skills section. See additional comments left. Best of luck.