View Resume
- Career Field
- Undecided
- Location
- San Francisco, CA San Jose, CA Seattle, WA
- School
- George Washington University
- Major
- Finance
- Groups
- GWU Delta Sigma Pi
- Salary Range
- $65-70,000
How can you continuously create something? Once created doesnt it exist? Therefore this cannot be present tense
what was the next step. You identified the problem, what was the solution. Expand this sentence
Make this stuff more action oriented. Your doing all of this client outreach, what has become of it? Was there a percentage increase in number of clients or assets managed?
GPA?
I like this accomplishment, but I dont like the fact that its a paragraph. Doesnt flow with the rest of your bullet point information
I love to see leadership activities on the resume. I general prefer details about them to be listed but you dont have to.
"in a quarterly basis" isnt the proper construct. "on a quarterly basis" is correct
past tense. Also try to keep to one line.
quantify
Jargon. Not really sure what you mean here.
on
seperate into seperate bullets perhaps.
word choice
Some of these are high school? If so, probably best to omit.
Some relevant coursework in this section would probably be stronger than some of the activities you currently have listed.
Id allign all of these places and dates right. As is they look a bit off. I feel that locations look best next to the description/title, but thats your call.
Descriptions overall in this section are especially strong. Good quanitification and wording for the most part. Id just be sure to put everything in past tense and try to trim to 1 line. If necessary you could probably cut the right margin.
Some of these bullets look to be different sizes. It might just be coming through strangely, but check.
GPA and/or test scores? Quant places will often like to see that, especially given how your work experience is much more on the management side.
Present tense for present jobs. "Lead" not "Leading," "Maintain," not "Maintaining."
More accomplishment focused. Avoid a laundry list of "what" you did. Focus on why it was important. How did you impact the organization?
You should be able to make these descriptions a little more concise. This will shorten them and make them easier to scan.
Avoid using "assist," it is vague and doesnt really tell us what you did.
Id trim down the activities and use the space for a more important Highlights of Qualifications section at the top.
I dont know that Id include these scholarships - taking up a lot of room and doesnt mean anything to most people. There are better uses of your space.
Comments
Sarwat, the format is clean and you have a lot of information presented. Just a few minor corrections are needed in my opinion. Education should either be the first section or the second. Your degree is more important for a job in finance than being the President of your Kickball league. Best of Luck!
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You have a lot of good work here. See my comments - focus more on accomplishments in your bullets. Eliminate a lot of the activities and awards in favor of skill summaries or a highlights section at the top. I'm happy to help if you have questions!
Miriam Salpeter,
Featured Expert Reviewer, razume
www.keppiecareers.com
comments...